Where Judgment Comes from and How to Recover

Ever feel like judgment is a dark cloud just hovering over your head, you? Wherever you go, it’s there, following you around. Sometimes it feels like you have nowhere else to go but to just… learn to live with it. Ugh. How did you even get here in the first place?

You know it wasn’t always like this, you, but you just can’t figure out how you got trapped. It’s so exhausting, isn’t it? Constantly feeling watched and judged for everything you say, do, wear, eat… literally everything.

But here’s a little secret, lovely:

The most important step in the case of “You vs. Judgment” is to understand your opponent first. Once you do that, the solutions start pouring in. And when you take action? That whole issue becomes nothing but a lesson from the past. For real.

The formula is pretty simple, but so many of us get caught up and overwhelmed with what’s right in front of us that we can’t see beyond the hurt.

And here’s something else you might not have realized: As a result of being judged, most people become judgmental themselves! It’s a nasty cycle. But today, right now, we’re going to break it. It’s time to make a difference in your life and in the lives of other women.

The beauty of this process is that you’ll not only heal your own pain, but you can share this with others and help them heal, too. We love to see it!

So Let’s Understand Judgment, Shall We?

To defeat the enemy, you have to know the enemy. Let’s break down what this whole judgment thing is really about.

Why Do People Judge, Anyway?

Honestly? The root of anything that causes this kind of pain is almost always fear. It’s a deep fear of being seen as insecure or weak. It’s a fear of not being good enough, of failure, or even of success. Fear of not being smart enough… this list could go on forever, ladies.

What’s the Real Outcome of Judgment?

A dead end, of course! It only hurts another person and pushes them deeper into judging themselves. There’s zero kindness in judgment and absolutely no solution. It’s just a way for someone to try and pull another person down to their level so they don’t feel so bad about their own stuff. It’s the ultimate waste of everyone’s precious time and energy.

How to Break Free and Take Your Power Back

Okay, this is the simple part! When you take something out of an equation, you have to replace it with something else. So since we’re taking “judgment” out, here’s what we’re replacing it with.

Stick to Your Truth, You

You are the only one who truly knows all of you- the good, the messy, and the magnificent. Love every single side of yourself. You wouldn’t hurt and judge your best friend for being human, right? So stop doing it to yourself. Treat yourself with that same fierce love and loyalty. Have you ever written down all the things you love about yourself? Give it a try and share one thing in the comments – let’s hype each other up!

Rise Above It All

Listen closely, you: if someone inflicts pain, it’s because they are in pain. See their pain, but do not become one with it. What do you do when you see someone who is hurting? You show compassion. Do just that. You don’t have to absorb their energy, but you can acknowledge their struggle from a distance. This is how you protect your own peace.

Forgive and Find Your Freedom

This part gets a whole lot easier after you truly see and feel their pain. You wouldn’t kick someone who’s already on the ground, right? Of course not! Instead, you can mentally extend a helping hand. If you can’t do that in the moment, that’s okay too- just walk away. You’ve found your path, and you can just hope they find theirs too. Forgiveness isn’t for them; it’s the key that unlocks your own cage.

As the amazing Gabby Bernstein said it best:

“I choose to judge nothing that occurs.”

Make that choice! It’s all yours to make, lovely. You’ve got this.