3 Ways to Develop Self-Confidence in a Relationship

Here are 3 ways to develop self-confidence in a relationship

Hey you! Did you know that on average, a person can have up to 50,000 thoughts per day? Yes, you read that right – 50,000! That is a whole lot of mental chatter going on inside that beautiful head of yours. Some of these thoughts might be brief and quickly pass us by, but others? They tend to stick around and have a lasting impact on how we continue to live our lives. The thoughts you have today help to form your experiences tomorrow.

Here is the truth, you. If we are choosing to constantly highlight the negative beliefs about ourselves, hide from the truth, suppress our emotions, and let others walk all over us, we diminish our self-esteem. When our cup is empty, we have less to give in a relationship. But what if you could turn this around in a few easy steps to develop self-confidence in your relationship?

Are you ready to take action now? Are you ready to work towards being the best version of you and have more connected and fulfilled relationships? I know you are!

Before we dive in, we’d love to know – what’s the biggest hurdle you face when trying to feel confident with your partner? Is it speaking up or feeling worthy? Drop a comment below, let’s chat about it!

1. Stop the guessing game

Have you ever had an issue with your partner and thought things like “they should know how I’m feeling” or “Isn’t it obvious what I need?” and yet that need is still unmet and unresolved? Oh lovely, we have all been there. It is frustrating, right? You are still hoping that by a certain miracle they develop the skills to either read minds or they just happen to ‘figure it out’.

The simple answer to that is – they don’t. You are so unique, you, and how you experience life will be completely different to another person. So how can you assume your partner thinks the same as you and just ‘knows’? If you refrain from expressing your needs, you will end up resenting those closest to you, and nobody wants that toxic energy lingering around.

Your individual needs and desires are important, and you are so worthy of having them fulfilled. Communication is the key here. Be upfront and honest with your partner. Get rid of the ‘grey area’ and all of the guessing by making it clear to them what you need and why it is important to you. If you articulate your needs, your partner can reciprocate. Have you tried being direct like this before? Tell us in the comments if it felt scary or liberating!

2. Draw a line in the sand

Having boundaries isn’t just saying no to the cake offered to you on your work break or declining an invitation to an outing on a weeknight (though sometimes a you just needs a night in with a face mask!). While they can be important, it is so much more than that. It is loving yourself enough to make decisions that serve YOU regardless of the reaction from others.

By having these healthy boundaries, you create a space to connect with yourself where you can determine what you accept, what you share, and who you let close to you. Establishing healthy boundaries within your relationship helps you to feel comfortable in who YOU are as a beautiful unique individual.

It strengthens your positive self-esteem. In order to establish this space and your boundaries, you must get clear on your values, what you believe in, and your limits. Don’t be afraid to communicate this to others, ladies. They are your rules and you are in control of what you allow in your life. Its your life to live, after all.

3. Feel, feel, feel

We spend hours a day on our phones glancing into the lives of others and as a result, we dont connect with the most important person – ourselves. How many times can you recall something exciting, frightening, spontaneous, or downright hilarious happening and before you know it, and as your clicking ‘confirm’ to post it for others, the moment passes you by? You’ve just blocked an opportunity to connect with your emotional self and completely feel your feelings.

If we do not feel into our emotions, there is no way we can move through them and open ourselves up to others. It is time to slow down, to be present, and to be in tune with your truth. In order to contribute to your relationship, you must develop a true sense of self and open yourself up to emotions you may have previously held yourself back from feeling.

It is then that you can share in emotions and develop compassion for your significant other. Schedule a time to sit doing nothing and feel into your emotions. Before doing this, ditch the judgment! Things may come up that feel uncomfortable and that is okay. Don’t try and avoid these feelings, acknowledge them, feel into them and move through them. Be kind to yourself, you.

Self-esteem starts with YOU.
Take the time for YOU today.
You are important.
You are worth it.
You matter.